We have been so busy lately! It's so much good stuff, but it also has us mostly around people who are not part of the sphere that we have been comfortably incubated in for a bit. We've enjoyed the company of some incredible people and doing some really fun activities. However, I was reminded just how differently we see the world now than we did just a few months ago. People who are not experiencing this firsthand have a hard time understanding it, even when they want to. Maybe it's insecurity, but I experience people seeing me as a pushy mom pretty regularly . . . whenever we're not surrounded by families with highly gifted people, that is. . .
One of my greatest fears and aversion as we began this journey was that my daughter would feel pushed to grow up too quickly. Closely associated with that was that she would feel that it was incumbant upon her to overachieve in every area. This is an unrealistic goal for anyone, and for a perfectionist, it's downright painful! As I have watched her and worked with her, I've learned that she needs more reign and less bit. When she finished a grade level in a matter of weeks, I forced myself to celebrate with her. Inside, and after bedtime, I was scared to death, and I cried as I realized just how different her life will be than I expected/hoped or than the "average" experience. Sure, there are wonderful things to this, but I still grieve the loss of the dreams and hopes I had.
Next school year, she will likely finsih three grade levels. Taken out of context and at face value, this sounds ridiculous. Last year, I would have interpreted this to be the statement of a pushy mother. The truth is that I would love it if she were satisfied and thriving with one grade level each year. Another truth is that she has not been. She is happier when she is allowed to gallop through the material, so I'm preparing to allow her some galloping room next school year. I'm planning three grade levels worth of curriculum for homeschooling. If we finish only one, I will not be disappointed. I'll be thrilled that I have the upcoming work already planned, in fact. If she finishes three grade levels worth of work by January, I will quit curriuculum again until the next school year, most likely . . . and there will be more crying . . . and probably swearing, on my part.
The beginning of last year, we struggled to find a routine and system that worked for both of us. It took 2 moths to finish the grade level we had pulled her out of in December . . . and I had started from the beginning of the grade level. Apparently, we learned to work well together, because she finished the next grade level in 5 weeks. It was a rare day when she spent more than an hour and a half on school work during an entire day. This was something we did only three or four days per week. I was hardly running her hard. However, she finished the work in less time than I spent preparing it . . . only now can I think about that without crying, and merely sigh.
Around other children, my daughter runs around screaming and can seem almost like a toddler. At a recent science class, she was acting more like a fifth grader . . . I find it hard to believe that many balance this range of behavioral ages. We also deal with teenager attitudes on a regular basis. None of those behavioral patterns match the stereotypical behavior for her age.
It's a part of her that I think it wonderful. She thoroughly enjoys herself and embraces her childlike desires. She also thinks deeply and intently, which enables her to view things in a very advanced creative way. Sometimes, her insights astound me; her perspective is beautiful. In our approach to her education, it would be easy to believe that we are not allowing her to be a kid. However, she is embracing what she desire, rather than what we do - bugs, for instance. I won't get into that, beyond the fact that someone recently predicted that she will be an entimologist, which means I should learn to spell it. It is too late at night for me to bother with spelling at the moment, however.
We are learning to embrace the differences in her and also cater to them, as much as possible. For instance, her grandparents are now forbidden to send bugs home, in a jar or otherwise. However, we recently procured a hamster cage and will be letting her get and care for a hamster. More animals are not on the parents' wish list in this house, but M is obsessed with them. We will own a hamster. She decided to get rid of virtually all of her toys. This was scary and is still wierd, in my opinion. However, she doesn't play with them, and would rather sell them in a garage sale and have the money for her fish tank and other fun projects, like a hamster. We will allow her to sell or give away most or all of her toys. Maybe she's better at living the simple life than we are. . . .
I wish you all simple pleasures. Today, some of mine were time with incredible and hard-working women who I thoroughly appreciate. Some others were finding clothes in our garage sale preparations for both my daughter and myself. We are looking forward to the learning experienc of a garage sale, which is also something that our daughter requested. I'm looking forward to it, even though I have been working very hard. She has done well, also. Good night.
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