Misconceptions of Giftedness

Yesterday, my family attended the MCGT (MN Council for Gifted and Talented) conference. It was our first of the annual conferences, and I highly recommend it. First of all, MCGT is very inclusive - no IQ test required, just join if you feel you and/or your child fit. There are a wide variety of people included: homeschoolers, traditional/public schoolers, competitives, casual members who have fun with it, etc. I have a few impressions that were big ones for me this year. [we'll see if Google will let me format correctly for once]: There is cultural misunderstanding around giftedness, and it is a distinction between "better at" and "better than" according to the keynote speaker, Dr James R Delisle. I agree with him. I am criticized and ostricize by the assumption that we feel there is a "better than" situation in our family. For most giftedness families I have met, this is FAR from the truth. In fact, before M's assessment and before joining any of the advocacy groups, I adamantly told her that she had BETTER not EVER get the idea that she was more important than anyone else. Are there ugly people in giftedness circles? Of course!! Can you name a group or category that doesn't have ugly people? I cannot. Often people ask me what giftedness is. I am still learning, and before M's assessment less than a year ago, I worked with highly gifted students for many years. I cannot give a brief description that will be accurate, let alone exhaustive. However, Annemarie Roeper did the best job of it I've seen yet. "Giftedness is a greater awareness, a greater sensitivity, and a greater ability to understand and transform perceptions into intellectual and emotional experiences." If this sounds like hypersensitivity to you, then you understand it like I do, and it's accurate, from my experience. I got to see Deb Ruf, author of 5 levels of gifted & local advocate and consultant on giftedness as well as teh mother of 3 adult men who are highly gifted. One of them is the boy from What about Bob :) I love chatting with her and she has helped us immensely. I got to listen to Teresa Boatman, another of our local advocate and consultant, who does a lot of work with Gifted kids and Twice Exceptional children. She spoke on intensities, which I have heard before and longed to hear again. I am not the only person who is consistently irritated with the people who regularly respond to our situation with things that boil down to "that's all good," or "that must be easy" - not so much. Yes, there are highlights, as there are with all children. There are also struggles, as there are with all children. Some of the challenges with giftedness include extreme anxiety, depression (up to and including Kindergartners who wish they were dead), loneliness, perfectionism, etc. Twice Exceptional children are highly gifted AND challenged with learning diability/ies. I often get told that someone is dealing with "the other end of the spectrum," which is not accurate. An obvious concept that floored me yesterday is the fact that sports and the arts are level-differentiated without controversy all the time within the schools. You have to try out for the varsity teams. You have to audition for parts in theater and chairs on competition musical groups. There is good reason for it. We don't want to keep those kids motivated and/or talented in those areas from stretching themselves and practicing at a higher level. What we don't understand is why it is seen as irrational to apply the same concepts to educational subjects, like science and math. If you are in a school district that does offer some differentiation, be thankful and protect it. There are schools in affluent areas of MN that are administratively opposed to it, and even principals that tell parents that "it's just a cop out." I disagree. There was much discussion yesterday about the school system, and I think most people misunderstand our approach to this. We are extremely PRO-teacher. Yes, we homeschool, but only after trying and failing to make traditional school work with the help of FABULOUS professionals within the schools. I admire and respect and am thankful for teachers, and other education professionals. The system that they have to work within right now, not so much. A free ebook recommended yesterday is "A Nation Deceived: How Schools Hold Back America's Brightest Students" which is available for free download in many languages. The title is purposely provocative, and it is available free of charge in the hopes that many will read it and think about the situation and concepts within the book. I love people. I love smart people. I love people who are less intelligent. Everyone has value, and I learn from people of all backgrounds, ages, etc. You may disagree with me, and I can respect you. Please be respectful in your replies, and I will respect you whether or not I agree with you. Wishing you and all children an environment where they can thrive and love learning!