Learning vs Teaching vs Coordinating vs Facilitating

Homeschooling has so many stereotypes that go with it. What makes this so difficult for me is that everyone does it so differently, yet people outside of homeschooling circles seem to make widespread assumptions about it. I read a blog today that made a point of saying you cannot be homeschooling while you're on the phone (she had been homeschooling for 20 years) or on fb, etc. While I agree that some degree of hands-on teaching is necessary, I felt a twist in that concept. My daughter is learning how to learn. Our challenge isn't to get her to a certain level in most things, overall. She is ahead in everything, and I don't want her feeling pushed to grow up too quickly. Instead, she needs to gain confidence and flexibility in her learning. When I get involved to my elbows, I have a tendency to take over and almost do it for her, especially when frustrated. Others in our homeschool group have the same experiences. This year, I am using a curriculum - Biblioplan, and I love how flexible it is. We are using a very broad, thorough enhanced version of the curriculum, and it covers history, geography, art, literature, spirituality, politics and more. M is absolutley loving it. She cannot get enough. As the name indicates, it begins with the Bible. I ran into a stunned parent within our homeschool group when I told him that I "taught" creation, evolution and big bang theories. I don't understand the confusion. She knows what we believe, and she is very interested in science, so is constantly running into evolution references, etc. She needs to know the theories. We talk about what I don't know, and I tell her it is because "I wasn't there when the world began" or that "I don't believe I will every understand the mind of God" and similar things. She is beginning to be comfortable not knowing, and wondering. Perfectionism runs rampant with kids like her, so this is a key point of our approach, and I believe makes a bigger difference than many of the "core" concepts. When it comes to math, we sit down and do a couple of examples together, most of the time. For grammar, that occurs sometimes, but less and less often. She knows to ask me when she is confused, etc. Very rarely do I look at her work and ask for corrections - and even then, only when the general concept is wrong, rather than a few problems/examples. I do not believe that I am a delinquint homeschooler with this approach, which does allow me considerable time online. Facebook is one of my links to the outside world, and as homeschooling can be isolating and overwhelming, I find this to be a benefit, rather than a hindrance. We watched "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat" the other day, as we are studying Egyptions along the Nile and the middle kingdom and the life of Joseph. M has been reading a lot about life in ancient Egypt, and as we watched, she told me that Joseph's cup (slipped into Benjamin's bag) should be silver "because silver was valued above gold in Ancient Egypt." I personally don't know if this is true, but believe her to retain most information correctly and it led to a great discussion. She felt empowered and confident that she had asked a question I had never considered. Then, Elvis-Ramses entered the scene & she laughed and said "I doubt it happened that way," sounding at least a decade beyond her tender years. I giggled with her. Bottom line for me is that there are many "right" ways to educate, since there are many different ways to learn and each child is different. It upsets me when people judge my decision, but I fight the temptation to retaliate when someone is shockingly rude. There are many right answers. We are not homeschooling because we believe that public schools are wrong. We are homeschooling because it is right for our daughter right now. We didn't choose this method because it is right for everyone. We chose it because it motivates and resonates with our daughter - it is right for her right now . . . Acceptance and Peace to you this week - I hope you are welcoming Fall with warm hearts!

Perceptions, presumption, precociousness and pretense

The start of a new school year - wow!! It's been tricky to get into a groove the last few weeks, but we're getting there. In the meantime, I'll admit I've been grumpy. While I was thrilled not to be doing the traditional very-specific back-to-school shopping list, there have been few places we go that the curiousness of our situation hasn't come up, due to the increase in questions about school. While M gets mistaken for being younger than she is, it is more obvious this year that our situation is non-traditional as people ask why she is not in school on a school day. I enjoyed the summer break more than I realized, apparently. More recently, I was in an environment heavily populated with people from my past. The circumstances for the situation were wonderful, and I'm glad we went. M was determined to go with me. I braced myself for LOTS of uncomfortable conversations with people unfamiliar with the last year of our lives. Interestingly, there were hardly any. Seriously, this is VERY rare for a day outside our home, even if we are among strangers. I found that many people either found her precosciousness adorable enough that they couldn't resist hugging a girl they didn't know. They didn't, however, ask for details about our lives. I got questions about where we lived, assessing the size and value of our homes (I presume, as their following comments compared other homes to our area in these ways). I got many speeches about what other people's kids my age were now doing (with as many references to high-pride jobs as possible, or statistics are wrong). Not one person asked what I am now doing. There were many questions about my connections to other people there (or in their circles). After almost an hour, I bumped into a girl I used to know - the older sister to a girl who had been in school with my daughter for years. She's a sweetie and started interacting with us. Her mother turned, and I asked about her other children. I got very short answers (which is very out of character), and she shuffled her daughter away, without one question about my daughter, who had been a playmate and schoolmate to her daughter for years. I wasn't as surprised as you might think, since it was consistent with the woman's personality. However, I was shocked at the coldness. I was able to keep M's attention away from it, fortunately. She misses her old friends. For months, we made attempts to reconnect with several of them. Only 1-2 followed up with us or made plans. This, I believe, is the part that is most difficult to figure out. My husband and I are seen as braggers if/when we talk about our daughter. I'd love to be able to be a proud parent without that perception. Celebrating milestones is perfectly normal, such as finishing gradeschool, among other things. However, since M is hitting milestones earlier, we're seen as proud in the sense of bragging, rather than in the sense of being appropriately appreciative and supportive of our daughter. This is one of the reasons I'm so excited to get back to our coop. I love that we can be around those people, express pleasure and express concern without the severe judgement that we encounter so often . . . It makes me sad, especially as I see so much in the media about being tolerant, appreciating and accepting differences, etc. I feel like our situation isn't included in the effort. At the risk of ruining my recently-earned reputation for being joyful, I bid you good night on that note. Hope your school year is off to a fabulous and fun start, no matter what your situation includes!!!